Odd Ducks

Odd Ducks

Bryden MacDonald

Language: English

Pages: 128

ISBN: 0889229341

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub

Welcome to the small town of Tartan Cross, Nova Scotia, where skeletons rattle in closets and past histories are so intertwined that the lives of four fortysomething, eccentric characters have become so complicated that something needs to change. In the comedy, Odd Ducks, award-winning playwright Bryden MacDonald positions his four characters at the brink of existential angst – and the action unfolds from there.

At the centre of the drama is Ambrose Archibald, an irredeemable reprobate and the type of guy who rants philosophically at the bar while mooching beer from his friends. He’s a narcissist who thinks he’s God’s gift to women. And he’s having an affair with the charming and beautiful Mandy Menzies, who was the high school beauty queen but is now stuck in a marriage of convenience and a life of boredom. Her housekeeper, Estelle Carmichael, has seen it all, but her prickly exterior belies a loving heart. The dryly funny Freddy Durdle is the perfect counter-
balance to over-the-top Ambrose.

All four oddballs seem stuck in their lives, but searing sarcasm relieves the boredom and crazy, everyday dramas aid their struggle to move on and keep things light

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overhead. Fly fly grandfather owl – announce your freedom to the world. The owl defecates in his eye. AMBROSE wipes his eye clean. Thank you! Thank you for acknowledging my existence! 5 MUSIC “Like a Prayer” by Madonna. With dramatic flair AMBROSE tears open his jacket and chucks it out of sight removes the bandage from his head tucks in his Led Zeppelin T-shirt produces a comb and slicks back his hair. AMBROSE comes to us. He smiles acknowledging our presence. He speaks to us. Yes friends –

think of something to make and sell. ESTELLE begins to exit. She sees us. She plops down the vacuum and purse and comes to speak to us. MANDY flips through her magazine. ESTELLE I could use more adventure. She was right. She is right. She’s a case without a cover – but she’s often right. 28 But I’m a private person. Past experience has taught me to – keep to myself. Cards close to the chest. And then you get used to that and – and it’s hard to change. Anyway – as much as I want to wring

way Freddy – the noble way. It’s no secret I pretty much hate humanity. The stupidity is killing me. I’m truly going into self‐imposed exile. FREDDY Before you get kicked out of town? AMBROSE More or less. FREDDY What have you done this time? AMBROSE Seriously – I had what can only be described as a calling. An epiphany. 45 I was passed out and I came to in a snap. Everything was crystal clear. And I was loaded the night before – pie‐eyed – even my thoughts were slurred. And I was told in my

it was just the beginning of a long list of mortifying situations I would find myself in. And truly up until that very dark time and since a virginity-losing fiasco in high school I only ever – well – led men on. 53 Only went so far. I was never “loose” in the common sense of the term. Well – high school but. Anyway I’ll make no more excuses other than to say I wasn’t myself at the time. I was not myself at the Odd Duck. I was not myself in that salad bar. But something good did come of it

AMBROSE I’m more stoned than drunk. Stress related. ESTELLE More like idiot related. AMBROSE Good one. You’re quick on the draw. And just look at you – wowza! I may not be a genie but I could sure make your dreams come true. 70 ESTELLE I’d rather be boiled in oil. AMBROSE Admit it – you kinda want me. ESTELLE Yeah – behind bars. AMBROSE I’m kidding. ESTELLE I’m not. ESTELLE points her fingers at her breasts and raises them to her eyes. My eyes are up here. AMBROSE And is that something in your

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