The Sinister Mr. Corpse

The Sinister Mr. Corpse

Jeff Strand

Language: English

Pages: 216

ISBN: B004O6MURM

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub


"Will have even the biggest stiffs laughing all the way to the grave." -- Rue Morgue

Zombies…

Sometimes they rise from the grave, hungering for human flesh…

Sometimes they’re created by a mad scientist intent on forming an unstoppable army of the undead…

Sometimes the zombie plague is transmitted by a horrific virus…

…and sometimes, they’re resurrected in front of millions of viewers as part of a live primetime television special.

This novel is the tale of Stanley Dabernath, zombie. A regular guy who dies, is brought back to life as a ghastly walking cadaver, and becomes the international sensation hailed by the press as The Amazing Mr. Corpse. Fame! Wealth! Groupies! Despite his ghoulish appearance, Stanley finds himself living the dream.

But in many ways, it’s harder to be a celebrity than a zombie. The suits behind Project Second Chance want to tell him how to behave in public. It’s difficult to enjoy a simple restaurant meal in peace. There’s constant pressure coming at him from all sides--not to mention that many people consider him a vile blasphemy that should be erased from existence.

And does Project Second Chance have Stanley’s best interests in mind, or is the real reason behind his reanimation something much more...sinister?

“Those expecting the typical apocalyptic world full of flesh eating corpses will quickly realize they are in for a different treat altogether. For those familiar with Mr. Strand’s popular Andrew Mayhem novels, take the witty banter, sharp one liners and laugh out loud moments, then turn it up a notch or three.” -- Horror World

The Dirty Joke Book

The Amateurs

I Am the New Black

The Comedy Quote Dictionary

Gleefully Macabre Tales

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hard to have a pulse when you don't have any blood. Just wanted to make sure nothing was squirming around in there." "I don't have any blood?" "Not a drop. It's being stored in jars in a freezer somewhere in the facility. Do you want to see it?" "Nah." "I guess there isn't any reason to check your heartbeat," said Dr. Arnzin with a wink. "Not gonna hear a lot of activity in that area, now are we?" Stanley pressed his palm to his heart. Nothing. "I'm not sure I like this," he admitted. "Oh,

gracious celebrity involves chuckling politely at things that aren't funny. So do it." Stanley cleared his throat. "Heh heh heh." "That's a macabre chuckle." "I can't chuckle under pressure." "A zombie walks into a bar and orders a screwdriver. The bartender says 'Do you want that in your ear?'" Stanley gave her a blank stare. "Have you seen the original Dawn of the Dead? A zombie gets a screwdriver jammed in its ear." "Ah." "That's the kind of humor you may have to chuckle at." "Can I

to speculate." "Fair enough. Now, does the thumbs-up sign that the other scientist is giving you mean that we're ready to begin?" "It does indeed, Donald. So I'm going to have to ask you and your camera crew to leave." Donald blinked. What the hell? "I'm only kidding. Just thought I'd add a touch of humor to an extremely weighty moment in human history." "Ah, well, I'm sure millions of viewers out there found it highly amusing." Brant walked over to the machine and placed his hand on the

think I could do something like that." "Nobody's asking you to." "I didn't say that anybody was asking me to, but if I were in that situation, I think I'd just leave the bullet where it was." Stanley frowned and jiggled the tweezers a bit. "Do you have it?" asked Tom. "I'm not sure. I think so. I can't tell." "Maybe you should lean your head down and shake it." Stanley started to tell him to shut up again, but then decided that the advice was sound and took it. "Anything?" "Do you see

first, and he stumbled backwards. Stanley pulled on his right leg. It stretched like it was made of elastic and popped free of the rope. Tom fired the gun. The bullet struck Stanley in the chest. Though he'd rather not have been shot, the pain was a welcome distraction from the itching and burning. He threw another stretchy punch at Hugh, missing by a few inches. Hugh grabbed his hand in a panic and tugged, pulling Stanley to his extremely wobbly feet. "He's fuckin' Plastic Man!" Hugh

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